Production Office: Annick Wolken
Entry #1

And now we present our "The Cleaner" blog! Hopefully if we do this right we can give you a good idea of not only what it's like to work on a TV series, but one that is based on a real person who deals with the situations our show presents every day. As often as possible, we'll try to give you an in-depth look at all the different jobs that go into making the episodes of "The Cleaner" that you watch and enjoy at home. Today, since I am in the wonderful position of birthing this blog, you can delight in the fascinating world of "The Cleaner" Production Office.

My parents (who are in the midwest and don't entirely "get" the entertainment industry) always ask me what I do every day as an Office PA here. Even though we do a lot of things that are incredibly important and vital to the daily existence of the show, when I tell them what I spend at least 12 hours a day doing, it never sounds glamorous or substantial. For example, telling them that I help distribute (or "distro" since we are fancy) endless amounts of paperwork doesn't really give them an idea of how that paperwork is critical to the running of the show. It sounds boring, like I'm some pencil-pushing cubicle-gnome complaining about TPS reports. In actuality, we'll get a new schedule for an episode that starts the next day and have to perform arts-and-crafts level origami to it in order to fit it onto the appropriately-sized paper, and then print enough copies to give our producers and the cast & crew (who are in the middle of shooting another episode), and as soon as we're done cutting-taping-copying-running-around, another schedule for that very same episode will come out and we have to start it all over again. Lather, rinse, repeat.

Our illustrious production office. Emptier than normal, and I promise in real life it looks much cleaner...I also promise that the person sitting on the floor is up to no good.

And then there are days when the entire cast and crew is on location. As a lowly PA, if there is an urgent run that needs to be done to bring a forgotten camera lens to set, I am the one who does it, but mostly the production office stays put on the CBS lot until the team returns. On these days (since our catering is off on location with the crew), it is our responsibility to get lunch for everyone. One would think this would be easy (and I'm sure anyone who has ever worked in an office environment will concur), but it's actually a fragile mess. For example, if one of the assistants eats red meat he vomits, but if there's no red meat, our payroll accountant gets really grumpy. If the food is too healthy, no one will eat it except for one of the writers, but if it's not healthy enough, everyone complains. There aren't many food allergies in our office, but one producer must have nitrate-free turkey on his sandwich, and if tomatoes appear in the presence of at least one member of our office, well, then I get a lecture on how tomatoes are like eating human flesh because they have skin, meat, and gooey insides. Which is, you know, not really the way I like to spend my lunch time.

So all this probably does sound kind of ridiculous, and at least I don't have to defend to you guys why it's a good idea that I live in Los Angeles and pursue a career in the entertainment industry when all of my siblings are in practical careers as podiatrists and meter maids. I love what I do and definitely wouldn't have it any other way.

Even when I have to walk through skid row in order to find Preperation-H Wipes for an inflamed director.

-Annick