| Her customers can't
vouch for her, but Shonna Smith's cosmetic talents are sure to reserve
her a spot inside the pearly gates. As Head Mortician of Poway Bernardo
Mortuary, she spends no less than six hours on each client, using her
morticious magic to turn them from dead to dazzling. How does she do
it? And how can the living benefit from her unique brand of genius?
Find out here.
Act Your Age
Too often, a grieving family will bring in photos of grandma circa 1961.
No need to shed decades from your look, simply because your feeling
lifeless. Instead, go for a natural appearance, accentuating your best
features in the here and now.
A Solid Foundation
No matter how vibrant we may be, we could all use a little well-directed
foundation. While Shonna's customers may need a thicker application
(she uses an oil-based variety she calls "dead makeup"), she advises
something lighter for the living. The most critical—and often
botched—area is the line between the face and the neck. The trick:
blend, blend, blend.
Keep It Clean
Hey, guys: One too many with the boys last night? When you wake up looking
like the walking dead, nothing helps breathe new life like a clean shave.
In fact, properly groomed facial hair is the key to a man's overall
appearance, no matter if you're headed to the cubicle or the casket.
The Eyes Have It
And why be afraid of eyeliner, simply because you're a man? When you've
got an important presentation or job interview, show up with a look
that says, "I wasn't born (nor did I die) yesterday." For this, Shonna
recommends a light application of eyeliner on the lids, just along the
lash line. Your eyes will look bolder and brighter, and as long you're
not conjuring Boy George, no one will be the wiser.
Beware the Discount 'Do
Wigs and hair extensions are a quick way to dial up your look, whether
to get gorgeous on date night or to mask that just-dead 'do. Shonna's
word to the wise: Don't be cheap when it comes to fake hair. Many of
her clients won't hesitate to spend $500 on a suit, but will accompany
it with a $3 wig. It's a mistake you only need to make once.
Read My Hands
You may not be able to tell a book by its cover, but you can tell a
woman's age by her hands. She'll spend a small fortune on plastic surgery,
face creams and botox, but at the end of the day, her age is written
all over her digits. So treat yours with the same TLC that you do your
face—even if that means indulging in the occasional hand lift.
Drop Dead Fashion
Some days we're alive and kicking, others we're not. For those mornings
when you're feeling particularly fatal, do as the dead do: opt for a
turtleneck and long sleeves. It not only keeps you prim and demure,
but ensures you'll be comfortable in dark, airless spaces.
Your Face In Lights
Feeling washed out? Consider your illumination factor. Even the grayest
pallor becomes a lively glow when viewed beneath the right lighting.
Shonna suggests taking a cue from funeral parlors: Consider installing
rose-colored bulbs in your home, office and even the interior of your
car. Your loved will say you never looked better.
The Big Finish
Before making an entrance, Shonna recommends putting on a finishing
dab of something wonderful. She uses Old Age Tint for these moments,
but for you, a dusting of powder or a swipe of lip gloss will give you
that fresh, I'm-ready-for-my-close-up face. |
